The Cowboy Snipe Hunt

The Cowboy Snipe Hunt by Gary Benton
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Now, most of y’all don’t know me, but my name is Cy and I’m an old cowboy. I jus’ hope the good Lord lets me get a little older a-fore he calls me home to them golden pastures in the sky. See, when I was a youngster, I headed to the country to learn how to be a cowboy and to make my fortune. I moved away from city people ‘cause I’m more or less a loner and like critters. While I did learn a powerful lot ‘bout them cows, ya know, I never did make that fortune. Or, did I?

I may be fairly short on greenbacks, but let me tell ya, I’m a rich man in memories. I’ve lived a life most of y’all would envy and some of ya would be scared of. I’ve fit wolves, bears, wolverines, and even a wife ‘er three, to protect my cows. But I would do ‘er all oveh again in a heartbeat. Why? With all of this heah jabberin’ I jus’ remembered a time, way back when I first workin’ cattle and a huntin’ trip where I played the fool, or was it the other way ‘round.

I was a young man back then, mayhap fifteen years old, and my body was better worked than my brain. Oh, I was smart ‘nough, but had a heap a learnin’ to do yet. My huntin’ partners, Slim and Zee, had taken me under their wings and taught me things that would keep a cowboy alive in rough country. Times was hard, but them two old men had the hair of the bear on ‘em, and as y’all know, that means they was tough no nonsense men.

One cold night in December, iffen I ‘members right, them two fellers decided we was gonna go on a snipe hunt. Waugh, how did I know they was fixin’ me up fer a tease! I found out later on in life there is a snipe bird, but they fer sure don’t live in the woods of Mississippi. Any who, they gave me this big empty grain bag, took me out into the dark cold night, and put me on a less than slightly used critter trail.

“Son, no matter how cold ya get, or how tired ya be, stay heah and wait fer me and Slim to drive them birds right to ya. I ‘spect they’ll come right down this heah trail fast like and all ya gotta do is scoop ‘em up in that bag.” Zee instructed as he filled his old briar pipe with tobacco.

“What do these birds look like? Do they make a sound when flushed? And, why don’t they fly away from y’all iffen yer gonna scare ‘em to me?” I asked in my innocence. I then assumed the bent over posture Zee indicated I had to use to catch the fast little critters, and pushed my cowboy hat to the rear of my head. Lordy, she’s cold, I thought.

“They is small son, ‘bout the size of a quail. They’ll not make a sound as they come, so ya gotta pay attention all the time. Plus they cain’t fly, but they do run pretty fast.” Zee replied and I still remember the serious look on his face as he spoke in the pale moonlight.

“Got it, Zee. Ya can ‘pend on me to get ‘em iffen they come this a-way.”

“Good, now I gotta go and get Slim, so we can start a-drivin’ them birds towards ya.”

Well, I wasn’t the smartest man riding herd, but after five hours I started to think I’d been had. A light snow began to fall and the temperature dropped to the point even the bears was a-thinkin’ ‘bout puttin’ on coats. I kept thinkin’ bout a cup of hot coffee and finally gave up the waitin’ game. Now, cowboys don’t give up easy, but I figured five hours was long ‘nough. In that time, Zee or Slim should have walked up to me, iffen they was a-drivin’ them birds toward me. So, I started back to the campfire, with a sore back I might add, from bein’ bent over fer so long.

As I neared the fire I hear’d Zee give a loud laugh, so I injuned up on the campsite. Why, them two old fools was a-sittin’ by that warm cracklin’ fire sippin’ on coffee from their tin cups. I knew at that moment they’d been a-funnin’ me and I was hot!

“That young jasper took it all serious like too, Slim!” I hear’d Zee say and then break into a loud horse laugh.

“Well, it’s purt cold out, but I’ll bet ya my bottom dollar, that boy will ‘member his first snipe hunt fer years!” Slim replied and then gave a loud belly laugh that echoed through the still night.

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